.Friday, July 03, 2009
should have known you'd bring my heartache
Paintball today was freaking freaking awesome fun!:)
I got hit on the leg once. And I can totally feel a burise forming.
And I got hit on the back while running to the first-aid hut.
Pfft! HAHA! I just made my way to the 'stake out' place,
and got shot..raised my hand, and right when i turned around to run to the hut,
I felt this damn sharp pain on my back.HAHA.
But omg, the adrenaline rush was freaking awesome.
My heart was seriously racing like mad.
And it was so funny cause once they sounded the uhm battle sound -- i dunno what its called.
Everyone just started randomly shooting.HAHA. Seriously.
Damn waste the paintball lor! But omg sososo fun!:D:D:D
I totally won't mind going to play again!:):)
Thanks for the awesome time TIMTAMS!:D
Now I can't wait for dinner @ Dempsey tomorrow :)
-
It's friends like these who make everything feel better :)
Really. When I'm hanging out with churchies,
my spirit just feels super uplifted and super happy :D
ILU!:D
.
should have known you'd bring my heartache
& you always thank God for family and friends who care (:
Friday was quite disgusting.
But thank God for friends who just make me feel tons better.
For the concern they showed, and the comfort they gave.
May have been just a 'are you okay?' or 'cheer up kay?'
But I really did feel all the love and concern. So thanks friends!:)
And bffoo! I'm sorry for being a bit zonked that day.
Thanks for underestanding though :):) ILOVEYOUMANYMANY!
& omg shushu!:D I was soooo glad when I saw you at Aston's!
It was just bitchfest times ten.Heeheehee!:D Loves you too unicornfriend!:D
Yesterday, was AWESOME.
Though I spent a good 45mins in the toilet crying my eyes out,
and praying to God that He would just take away the feelings that I was feeling.
And I did feel quite shit from time to time. After my good long cry, I'd feel better,
but I'd start feeling shitzxz like one hour later..It was horrendous. HORRENDOUS.
But my sister, was the BEST!:D
She spent yesterday with me, rented dvds from video ez and bought junk food from Cold Storage, all this just to make me feel better, and to help me forget things.
I enjoyed every moment just spent with my sister dearest :)
Haven't done this in a while, and bitching sesions with her are, THE.BEST.
She always knows how to make me feel tons better :)
I loving you very much sisterzxz!
CAUSE WE ARE SISTERS! -insert rest of lyrics here- (HAHA!)
Suyisies :) Thanks for making me feel tons better!
You really really understood how I felt.
And I really could relate to what you were saying.
And I'd take your advice and just think positive,
and just treat this as a learning experience :)
ILOVEYOU, and I can't wait for our 'concert' in Sep! HEEHEE!:D
Church was good. I felt sooo rejuvinated after leaving service.
Singing songs kinda made me tear up a little from time to time.
Cause I guess I was reminded that God's love is really sufficient.
And that He would ALWAYS be there for me, which is an AWESOME PROMISE.
And I know that in this promise, I can trust.
Cause God made it, and God doesn't break promises(:
Kinda told Carol, Eve & Bfish what happened and I'm glad for friends like them :)
For the comfort, loves, hugs, smiles and prayers (:
You know I love you guys VERY much.
And I'm always thanking God for placing you guys in my life :)
And yes, I won't dwell on things and I will slowly learn to trust soon enough.
But right now, I just can't. Broken, beatened, battered.
I just can't trust right now. But I'm sure as time goes by,
I'd feel better and I would slowly learn to really trust someone again.
But honestly, right now, I just can't. I'm so wary about whatever someone says,
about their motives and if they would just turn around randomly,
slap me in the face and walk away.
Just like what you did.
But I am feeling TONS better for some reason!:)
I REALLY am! I feel stronger, better, happier.
And I thank God for helping me through this time. I really do.
One prayer did everything. I prayed and begged for everything to just STOP.
I wanted everything to go away. I literally begged.
It took a few days, but I can say that I'm feeling A LOT better.
I miss the talks, the calls the random banters,
but it's not worth this shit. And though I feel it most at night,
I'm sure in time to come, my nights will be back to normal.
I'm sure that with God,family and friends, things will just get back to normal again.
Just so you know, you hurt me bad.
And maybe you don't know how bad you did, you probably NEVER will.
But I will NEVER wish this on any girl.
Cause at that lowest point in time, you just feel so used, hurt, betrayed, shocked and insulted.
I felt like some freaking slut and some bitch. Which I never want to be.
I could actually feel my heart aching. And my stomach was just twisting.
And that lump in my throat never went away.
I would wake up wanting to cry, shower AND cry, sit and stare in space and start crying.
It was one of the lowest time of my life.
But as someone told me, 'remember liz, what doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger.'
I agree. I think I will be stronger after this. Much stronger.
You know world, I think I'm going to be just fine :D
Cause it makes me that much stronger,
makes me work a little bit harder.
Makes me that much wiser,
so thanks for making me a fighter.
Made me learn a little bit faster,
made my skin a little bit thicker.
Makes me that much smarter,
so thanks for making me a fighter.
